Today is my daughter’s 12th birthday so it is only natural that family members would pass along the wishes for a happy birthday. When it is coming from someone who is toxic, disrespectful, and takes no blame for their actions it can take away from your mojo. Stay strong survivors. So far it is never ending.

Good morning Misty. I’m texting to ask if you’ll please let my granddaughter Hayleigh know we her family wish her a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY today! We send her our best wishes for all she wishes for in her precious life. We love her very much. If I can’t speak with Her at least I hope someday she’ll know we tried.

Probably should have ended it here. Have no fear that I will not only tell Hayleigh that you sent a text but will also let her read it. I am open with all of my children and have no reason to hide what I say to you guys as I am not in the wrong no matter how many times you repeat it. Both of my minor children are biologically related to you, that is fact, but the youngest seems to get the shaft in all communication which is why I am teaching them that family is not just blood. When was the last time you have called or sent a text to Pru on her birthday? You haven’t.  It is obvious to the kids where they stand. At the moment they are meeting more of their family that is biologically related to me and I am sorry you are against that.

Thx for your response to my last attempt to speak with by granddaughters, as I don’t feel you are being fair to anyone in this family.

You’re welcome and I am sorry you feel that way.

You may have the girls with you, however one day they may realize that you were not cooperating with their family to be a part of them. If you have so much resentment and hate that’s your issue to deal with not ours. It’s very sad you use them to turn against their own family members.

I DO have the girls with me and that is because they have a father who lacks the ability to put his children first. He hasn’t supported any of his seven children on a consistent basis and these two at all in the last 15 months. I would think that the person that IS taking care of his children 100% might get a little bit of respect but you never respected the other baby mammas behind their backs why would you respect me to my face? Him losing custody of his children had everything to do with him. You raised him not me.

You are aware that most states prefer 50/50 custody? They have requirements for sole custody and it’s pretty hard to get, without meeting those requirements. I presented my case in a court of law and was awarded sole custody physical and legal and he received zero parenting time and an obligation to pay support and catch up on his arrears. He is still not paying support and he also told them he would send them money at Halloween and Christmas for them to receive nothing. Do not tell me what I am doing wrong to you, I am doing right by my kids.

I listed in the last article what it would take for him to regain his parenting time, feel free to look back if you forgot. I would think that if you thought it was important enough to be in your grandchildren’s lives that you would encourage him to do the right thing. The problem is that you can’t do any better of a job with that than any of the rest of us that have tried in the past. The girls know what has gone on in our family. I don’t lie to my children nor do I hide information and I teach them that actions speak louder than words.

They know that I chose to cut you out of MY life when you accused their sister of cussing out a baby because spitting your venom on my children was the last straw. I took it in stride over the first 8 years and just tried to brush it off as this is just how you are but you went too far. They know you threatened me with taking me to court. They know the times they went to see you with their father, who also avoided you like the plague, they were ignored by the family that claims to love them all the while their actions say the opposite and how that made them feel.

Just an FYI I don’t have any resentment towards any of you I am just loving myself enough not to put up with the abuse and psychological projection.

Psychological projection is a defense mechanism in which the human ego defends itself against unconscious impulses or qualities (both positive and negative) by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others.

You say leave a message and you’ll let them decide if they want to talk to us, however neither of them have ever called. I don’t believe you’ve ever let them know we call. No one here has ever done anything to those girls that would make them believe they don’t want anything to do with us. You made those decisions for them. So sad Misty, so very sad. I’ll keep praying for them and you. The choices we make will in the end come back at us. You know very well I’ve tried to reach them. You can tell anyone you choose we haven’t but your the one who has to live with the truth.

I say leave a voicemail and I will play it for them, leave an email in my inbox and I will respond, get Hayleigh’s email from her father and try to communicate from there but Prudence won’t give her email to her father because that is her choice, but for all that is holy stay out of my text message inbox. I am not your friend and you have never considered me family. My children and I were all treated like second class citizens in your eyes. Actions speak louder than words.

Neither of my girls has called you because they choose not to and up until last month, you have not reached out to them at all no matter how many times you say you have because I got this text so if you tried to send any others I would have gotten them too. They have everyone’s phone number if they choose to call you. They spend time on the phone with their friends, their sisters that have been there non stop and there is nothing stopping them from calling you except maybe that it IS their choice. Continue to blame me if it makes you feel better but I no longer take the blame for things I am not doing.

The choices you make today will affect you for the rest of your life.

The one thing your son drilled in every one of our heads while we were together. Sorry, your choices have gotten you here and I’m sorry his choices got him to where he is. I am confident that Karma will be good to me as I only did what I needed to do to protect myself and my children and to stay healthy. While you guys were giving him money hand over fist to feed his drug addiction he was lying to me about that addiction and calling me crazy because of my reaction to his abuse. It is now time to take the unhealthy out. We don’t want to continue to hear the same thing that he is clean and sober but his actions scream otherwise.

While you were loving your grandchildren you were helping their father ruin his relationship with them. Do you have any clue what he put us through? No, because you’ve never asked. The more you put your thoughts in writing the more I see exactly where he got it from. The apple does not fall from the tree. Right now, I am moving on.

 

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